A comment popped in my head the other day a day in which I said I was bored and you said it was because you weren't with me. At the time I got annoyed because I was like I have other people to hang out with and I took it offensively. I guess what I should have seen it as your were right It was because I was wasn't with you because there is only one you. Your the one who makes me laugh and the who drives me bonkers but the truth of the matter is I'm in love with you. Maybe that why I'm okay with letting you figure yourself out letting us both figure ourselves out as far as our careers. I know one thing I don't need to figure out my feelings for you I know them. Just thinking about everything we did makes me happy and sad at the same , partly because I know there is so much more to do and sad because I wish we could do it sooner. Something else that I never experienced is I always use to wish someone was there with me but with you its even better its like your standing behind me , for me your in every experience I'm having. Now this is gonna sound a little crazy and I'm hoping this blog doesn't scare you but the other night I looked in the mirror and I pictured you smiling back at me. I don't know what it meant truthfully but it was odd at first and then I started to smile too. I know you definitely have a spell on me because when you text me my face still lights up and when I'm talking about you I still smile big even though you left. I really don't know the feelings you feel only what I noticed in your expressions and actions because I know towards the end you didn't say much about them because you had to go. The other crazy part is I wasn't angry once you left I have been really peaceful and of course some tears have flown but like always they just come out in droplets and I cant stop them. Do you remember when we first started dating and a day would go by and you said you missed me well I finally understand how you felt back then. I thought I missed you because I was use to being around you 24/7 and then I realized it was because I loved being around you. It amazed me how I touched your stuff and I didn't get upset I mean its not like I felt nothing but it wasn't sadness it was comfort. I think because I finally realized what you taught me ... it was faith. I've had faith before but not like this and I know more than anything everything will be okay. I know we are meant to be......I feel it!
